Motorcycle Diary

I’ve had a motorcycle on the brain for a couple of weeks now ever since I talked to my friend Dave in California. He was calling me from a pizza place just after finishing an audition and told me that after we got off the phone, he was going to ride his bike home on this gorgeous route through hills, valley and nature that one can’t imagine existing in LA. “About 20 miles” he said. “Dave that’s a big workout after a hard day of work - is it a mountain bike or roadie", I asked. “It’s a Harley”. Then it hit me. It is a bike, but better. Two wheels still but speed, freedom, and the potential for a speeding ticket. No space for groceries yet can still get to where you need to go and make it count. Yes, Yes, this is an answer to a question I didn’t know I was asking.

My last experience on a “bike” was in college back in Indiana. I was being throttled around on the back of a speedy Japanese model (they all look alike) down fraternity row by my friend Troy, indeed a golden boy. We cruised past Troy’s fraternity house (don’t think of saying “frat”…you wouldn’t call your country a count, would you?) One of his brothers saw us from the intensely green front lawn and kicked a soccer ball at Troy and his waist-grabbing buddy on the back. It must have been a frat thing (whoops!). The ball literally rolled right under the Japanese machine behind the front wheel like it was scripted to just miss catastrophe and elicit a collection of laughs from the brothers on the lawn. I took it as a sign, a free pass to getting out of quadriplegia or brain damage or both (no helmet law in Indiana).

Dave in California had a bike (bicycle) for the past two years which he used to get around La La Land while his wife Heather had the one car. This December, he graduated from the Trek to the Harley; bike-to-BIKE that fast. Part of me likes the utilitarian aspect of owning the bike. If we move to Cali, Suz can have the car and I’ll have the bike. (one car – two people reeks of headaches and more speeding tickets) The bike also appeals to my green side. Why buy a hybrid when you can get even better mileage, feel nature all around you, and wear a cool 100% organic cotton tee while riding past traffic between lanes. Dammit, I am the solution to both the environmental problem and the traffic problem!

As for me, the ascension will be rapid, even more so than Dave. I will matriculate from having no car in the last eight years and the kick scooter I commuted cross-town on the last year (no, it was the cool one and not the Razor) to a BIKE. It’s more of a comfortable sidestep. When life kicks a soccer ball at your undercarriage, KICK BACK! Of course with a helmet – it’s the law.